Monday, October 20, 2008

Q & A: I'm interested in trying anal sex. Any tips?

Q. I'm interested in trying anal sex. Any tips?

A. Our four guidelines for anal sex are: communication, lubrication, patience, and protection.

  • Communication: Communication is exceptionally important in anal sex, both before and during. The "before" part is talking to your partner beforehand, to make sure that you're both signed up for this activity. The "during" part is making sure that the person being penetrated is in control, and is communicating to the penetrating person how things are going -- how fast to go, whether to ease up, etc.

  • Lubrication: Unlike the vagina or the mouth, the anus and rectum don't have a built-in source of lubrication. Even worse, the rectum is designed to absorb liquids. So, you've got to provide your own lube, and lots of it. The rule of thumb is to use as much as you think you need, and then use more. If you're using condoms, be sure to use a water-based lubricant (e.g., Astroglide).

  • Patience: Go slowly, and follow the lead of the person being penetrated. You may want to start with a finger first, to get the anus used to something smaller. If the person being penetrated is relatively inexperienced at this, take the pressure off by giving up on goals and concentrating more on enjoying the process. In other words, don't think of how far you want to go with this project ("Oh, boy, it's going to feel good when I'm inside"), but rather, focus on the journey ("Hey, this is fun!") Like so many things worth doing, it may take several tries before you're both happy with it.

  • Protection: Anal sex is one of the highest-risk activities for transmitting HIV, the virus that causes AIDS. But other sexually transmitted diseases can be spread through anal sex as well. So, we strongly recommend using condoms during anal sex. The person doing the penetrating should also be sure to wash his hands and penis afterwards, to avoid spreading other diseases like hepatitis.

No comments:

Post a Comment