Saturday, December 27, 2008

Q & A: What lubricant to use if she gets dry and sore?

Q. What lubricant to use if she gets dry and sore?

A. There are two types of lubricants most commonly used by couples: water-based and oil-based. Oil-based destroy latex condoms, water-based don't. If you look from pure pleasure and pain reduction perspective, and if you do not use condoms, oil-based lubricants tend to work better than water-based, because as we all know anything to do with oil lubricates much better than anything to do with water. Oil-based lubricants stick and stay much longer around the walls, and don't wear out as quickly.

However, the ongoing spread of STDs and AIDS puts water-based lubricants as our favorites for safer sex play. Amount of choice is quite wide. Most water-based lubricants seem to have the same ingredients - water and glycerin, mostly - and are priced more or less in the same range. Here are the test results of the most common brands to find out the differences.


Following is a list of lubes that were sampled, as well as the final evaluation of their merit. All lubes that were tested contained no nonoxynol-9 (a detergent/spermicide that kills HIV in test tubes) because it tends to irritate the skin.

I-D has an average price and a medium consistency. It stays wet for a long time and re-wets well with spit or water. It doesn't get tacky and is non-irritating. All lubes claim to be "odorless" and "tasteless" even though they usually have a mild aroma reminiscent of Play-Doh. I-D is probably the least offensive taste- and smell-wise. I-D works well for a variety of play. Overall Rating: Excellent

Body Wise Liquid Silk is imported from the UK and has no list of ingredients. The distribution in the US is limited, but it's available through the good people at Good Vibrations. Liquid Silk is incredible! It feels very silky, stays slick for a long time and re-wets very well. Highly recommended! Overall Rating: Excellent

Astroglide falls between Wet and Probe in terms of consistency, on the thin, watery end of the scale. My main complaint about Astroglide is it's price -- in some stores this lube can cost twice as much as other brands! Astroglide stays wet for a long time and re-wets better than any other lube. Save yourself some money, though, and look into other brands. Overall Rating: Excellent, but expensive.

Wet is medium priced and economical despite their widespread advertising. Wet does stay wet, primarily because it has a thin consistency due to the high water/glycerin ratio. I'd recommend Wet over other lubes for anal play as it stays slick the longest and re-wets very well. Overall Rating: Very good.

K-Y Jelly is one of the most recognised water-based lubricants. Some women swear by K-Y for vaginal lubrication, but our test puts it only as average. K-Y is thick and dry and therefore provides somewhat inferior lubrication. K-Y gets tacky and gummy quickly and cannot be re-wet. K-Y has problems in terms of providing proper lubrication for latex. Overall Rating: Average.

Aqua Lube is brought to you by the people who bring you Kimono condoms. Price-wise, it's probably the cheapest on the market. It stays slick for a very long time and has a thick consistency which can feel really incredible. While Aqua Lube doesn't tend to get gummy, it can be difficult to re-wet once it does dry out. Overall Rating: Average.

Probe had the thinnest consistency of all the lubes in our sample and dried up the most quickly as well. Probe contains grapefruit seed extract, which gives it a pleasant taste if you're going down on someone who's used it. This popular brand is moderately priced but dries much too quickly to be a good lube value. Overall Rating: Below average.

Corn Husker's Lotion has basically the same ingredients as most lubes, but the SD alcohol 40 in the lotion gives it a cool feeling. Unfortunately, Corn Husker's Lotion is absorbed into the skin very quickly and it gets gummy with repeated movement. A great moisturizer, but not a great lube, despite the cheap price. Overall Rating: Poor.

Embrace is so thick it barely comes out of the bottle. It dries quickly and gets gummy, not allowing to be re-wet. This product also comes in a nasty strawberry scent that should be avoided. Embrace is very inexpensive, but is not a great lube value. Overall Rating: Very poor

Friday, December 26, 2008

Screaming orgasm: Pornstar's exclusive guide


The physical attraction between men and women is just as strong as ever. It's not knowing how to satisfy one another that is the current problem in people's bedrooms today. Intercourse is no longer just a man's tool for sexual pleasure. With the upsurge of women's liberation, women now feel that they too have the right to be satisfied in bed. Now that men must consider pleasing someone other than themselves, a number of men are finding that they have trouble satisfying the opposite sex. It isn't entirely the fault of the male, as many women demand pleasure without completely understanding what they find self-gratifying in the first place. Without this understanding, it is impossible to communicate your needs and desires to your sexual partner. Given this dilemma, a man should not be afraid to take control of the sexual reins, so long as he knows what he is doing. The man must have confidence in his own sexuality in order to communicate this to his lover.

This goes for women too. In order to gain confidence, a man and a woman must have full understanding of both the technical and operational aspects of their own sexual organs and the sexual organs of the opposite sex. Embedded in this knowledge are the tools necessary to teach you how to stimulate both yourself and your partner. Naturally, your confidence will grow out of experience, but it is always more beneficial to be knowledgeable about various aspects of sex rather than just "wing it" all the time. A large factor in the sexual satisfaction of a woman, and one that is quite often missing, is respect. You need to treat a woman's body not as an object of possession, but as an object of honor and appreciation. You need to heighten your own sensitivity to your partner's sexual responses, then act on them accordingly. Be creative. Women are also moved by fantasy and make-believe in the bedroom, so go ahead and give it a try. No one wants their sex life to become dull and routine. Just make sure that every new aspect you bring into the bedroom in done with thoughtfulness and not with force.

If you want a positive sexual relationship, you must start with a positive attitude about sex itself. Never let the current sexual freedoms of today, like the explicit adult videos and literature, diminish the respect you have for the actual women you encounter in your personal sex life. Without the element of respect, your own personal sexual relationships are doomed to failure. Remember that the more time and effort you put into your sex life, the more you will gain from it. It should never be a source of shame or embarrassment if you need to solicit sexual advice from time to time. This new knowledge should only heighten your self-confidence, which should make you an even better lover the next time the opportunity arises. The real keys to satisfying a woman lie in the sexual knowledge you are able to acquire, the sexual technique you are able to develop, and the positive mental attitude that arises from knowing you possess the first two.

The Basics

Nobody gets it right every time. In order for you to be considered a good lover, you just need to try to make the experience unique and memorable for your woman.

Many men get extremely hung up as to where they rank on a woman's list of past lovers, yet this obsession does nothing but undermine a man's potential performance. Remember the self-confidence we've been talking about? If you worry too much about the past, then your confidence goes right out the door. Rather than spending time worrying about what other men have done in the past, worry about what you can do now to ensure a bright sexual future for you and your future partners. Just remember the basics of good hygiene, like shaving, clipping your fingernails, and brushing your teeth. Try not to force new sexual acts that make your partner uncomfortable. Also, try and control the urge to roll over and go to sleep immediately after ejaculation. It's just little exhibitions of warmth such as these that will keep you in the good graces of the woman you are sleeping with.

There is no foolproof method to satisfying each and every woman you come into contact with, but work on your own personal mindset. Openly display your own sexual pleasure and she will most likely feed off your satisfaction. Convince yourself that you are the best in bed and you will be the best. Remember that the sexual needs of a woman are primarily about emotions and security. Keep the sex exciting and fresh. When you finally put all the aforementioned elements together, you should begin to see a drastic improvement in your sexual performance. More importantly, so should your lovers.

How the Penis Functions

It is imperative that you not only understand the intricate workings of your own sexual organ, but that you have intimate knowledge of the way the sexual organ of the opposite sex works. With this knowledge comes the confidence in your own penis that you need to become a self-assured lover. There is always talk about the physical prowess of a man's penis, but this is all irrelevant to your actual ability to pleasure a woman in bed.

When erect, a smaller penis tends to grow proportionately larger than bigger ones. seems like you would want to judge an erect It penis, if anything, so now you know that all men are virtually created equal. If you truly interested in the averages, then here are they are: Avg. length - 6.375 inches Avg. girth - 4.12 inches Avg. ejaculation after 2 days without sex - 2 milliliters You can sit around all day crunching the numbers and measuring your dick or you can keep in mind the simple fact that the best test of your penis is whether or not you can satisfy a woman in bed. That's all that really counts. There is no direct correlation between the size of a man's penis and his sex drive. There is also no correlation between the physical size of a man and the size of his penis. While we are on the subject, there is also no correlation between the size of a man's balls and his sex drive or his ability to father a child. All of these hypotheses are clearly myths that have disturbed the male psyche for ages.

Well, let's just dispel all these myths right here and now. Try to remain mindful of the fact that there is not a set number of erections you might be able to experience on any given night. The results vary and that is a fact for all men. Do not be discouraged if you need a little break in-between sexual encounters, since it usually takes ten to fifteen minutes recovery time before a man is able to make love again after reaching ejaculation from a previous sexual episode. Always remember that it is the quality, not the quantity that matters anyway. This is where masturbation may come in handy, no pun intended. It is crucial that you understand how you like your penis to be played with so you can show your sexual partner what feels best to you. When you pleasure yourself, then you are able to feel all the internal mechanisms that bring you to climax. Once you learn to recognize the process that drives you to climax, you can better control yourself during intercourse, which will invariably lead to more gratification for both you and your lover.

Sexual Expectations of Women

It is hard to have high expectations for sexual performance if you've never communicated your likes and dislikes to your lover. Your aim is to build up a sexual compatibility, so you need to communicate with one another and share your deepest sexual fantasies and desires. Unfortunately, most women aren't too good at this which creates a lot of dissatisfaction and tension in the bedroom. One of the golden rules is to never suffer silently from sexual dissatisfaction. Go ahead and speak aloud about your sex life, even if you are afraid of making a fool of yourself in the bedroom. Since it is so inherently difficult for women to speak openly about sex, men need to make sure and provide their women with plenty of room to tell you what turns them on. The things that women crave in the bedroom really are fairly basic, like kissing. Men are quite often guilty of getting so into the act of intercourse and of focusing solely on satisfying themselves that they forget to kiss their partner and make it nice for her. Women like to talk and there is nothing wrong with a little playful banter in the bedroom as well. Not all women like the lewd, crude dirty talk either. Just tell her how great her body feels or how pretty she is. Women like to be held and caressed, not just pinched and pulled. Also, don't just dive directly into intercourse…try a little foreplay. I'm not talking an all-night experience, but don't rush things like you're trying to catch a movie afterwards or something. If there's foreplay, then why not a little afterplay too. Just hold her in your arms. Men always joke about getting neck cramps and having their arms fall asleep from having to hold their woman too long after sex, but five minutes isn't going to kill you. Of course, women like just straightforward intercourse and oral sex as well. The woman wants to climax just as much as the man does, so make sure you try to accommodate her too. If you spend the night together, try making love the next morning. Since women are more emotional in the bedroom, they need more reassurance that the prior night's acts were genuine. If you are genuine, then you'll enjoy making love again yourself, so there's no real torture involved. Romance is a sort of sexual stimulus for women. Most women need romance in order for the sexual experience to be completely satisfying for them. There needs to be an emotional build-up preceding the actual act of sex, which is a form of foreplay for the woman. A man just needs to constantly keep in mind the fact that his ultimate goal is to satisfy not only himself, but also his lover. Accordingly, there must be a balance between deliberation and self-indulgence.

The Female Body

In order for you to be good in bed, you need to look at a woman's vagina as more than just a slit or a hole. You must make an effort to understand the shape and construction of a woman's sexual organ, as well as how it performs during sexual acts. The clitoris is the most sexually sensitive spot on a woman's body. In reality, a woman's clitoris is the equivalent of a man's penis, only smaller. A woman generally derives the most pleasure from a soft, constant "strumming" right above the peak of the clitoris. It will benefit both you and your lover if you take the time to explore your woman's body and become more familiar with its intricacies. Try inserting two fingers into her vagina and opening them up like a pair of scissors. This should provide you with a better understanding of just how elastic the vagina really is. Always take particular care not to scratch or hurt your lover, as the lining of the vagina is both sensitive and delicate. As with males, it is mutually beneficial for females to masturbate. If a woman learns how to bring herself to orgasm, she will be able to teach her lover how to do the same. For women, though, sex without orgasm is perfectly alright providing that the total experience is still emotionally and sexually fulfilling. If your woman has trouble reaching orgasm, you may want to try penetrating her from behind. The angle of this thrust pushes her internal flesh against her pubic bone, transmitting pressure into the buried tissues of her clitoris. You can also heighten sexuality through the element of suspense. If a male can teach himself to control his urges to penetrate his lover immediately upon getting her clothes off, then the path to sexual pleasure can be much longer and explosive. Try teasing your woman a little by not putting your whole penis inside of her right off the bat, but by simply inserting the head of the penis. Also, rub the head of the penis up and down the outer lips of her vagina. This form of foreplay should make your woman more responsive when you do finally enter her. You may also want to encourage your partner to watch you entering her either with the use of mirrors or through positioning. Any technique that suspends the inevitable sexual eruption should help increase the pleasure for both of you.

Raising The Level Of Excitement

Just as a man's penis swells when he becomes sexually aroused, so too does a woman experience physical changes in her body when she becomes sexually stimulated. One change in a woman's body is that her labia majora swells, as do her breasts. Her nipples harden and her vagina relaxes and deepens. Also, she secretes a lubricant from her vaginal walls. A woman is capable of experiencing multiple orgasms directly following her first orgasm. In order to get a woman to the stage of multiple orgasm, though, a man must take a few steps. It is helpful if the two of you engage in some imaginative foreplay. You want to make certain that her vagina is intensely stimulated prior to penetration. Make sure that she is well lubricated before intercourse and always remember to take a slow and easy approach to penetration. A woman wants to feel valued and she wants you two to share your feelings with one another. One of the best ways to communicate these feeling to her is by continually caressing her body throughout lovemaking. This also ties into one of the major keys to good lovemaking, which is never rush it. Don't be afraid to use your fingers as well as your penis to stimulate your lover. Feel the way your woman's vagina changes throughout your sexual experience and change with it. As your partner reaches orgasm, you will notice some changes in her body. Her vaginal muscles will tighten, causing her insides to grip the shaft of your penis. Most men dream of simultaneous orgasm with their partners, but the truth is that this does not occur very frequently. The mood and timing have to be just so for this phenomenon to occur. You can, however, increase the likelihood of simultaneous orgasm by working on timing with your lover. The better you know one another, the more you increase your chances of attaining simultaneous orgasm. Some men find themselves plagued by premature ejaculation. The good news is that this is largely a matter of habit, so the sooner you rid yourself of the self-perpetuating thoughts that are causing it, the faster it will go away for good. If you ever find yourself with problems sustaining an erection, be sure to discuss the problem with your lover. Otherwise, she may become anxious, suspicious, and frustrated because she doesn't know what is going on with you. Relax. Erections generally return naturally.

Oral Sex

There are still a lot of women out there who are turned off by the idea of oral sex, but this is generally because they've never tried it. Once a woman experiences cunnilingus, she usually finds it quite enjoyable and is anxious to incorporate it into her sexual repertoire. Here are a few instructions for performing cunnilingus for you men who have yet to work it into your sexual repertoire either. First, lick your woman's clitoris with the tip of your tongue. Remember to always be gentle. Don't forget that you also have your hands to work with, so use them to fondle her breasts or insert a couple of fingers inside her anus or vagina. Part her outer lips with your tongue and insert your stiffened tongue into her vagina. Slowly thrust your tongue in and out of her. Hold the outer lips of the vulva apart and run the tip of your tongue along her clitoris, licking softly and steadily until she becomes aroused. Make sure to maintain a continuous and rhythmic licking motion, as this is what will ultimately cause her to climax. While women are able to receive oral sex, then go immediately into intercourse, males are more restricted. Fellatio is more or less a substitute for intercourse. In order to make fellatio more pleasurable for you, tell your woman what to do in order to please you. Since you know how it feels to you, it is your job to communicate your feeling to her so she knows your like and dislikes.


Sex today is not like sex was just a couple of decades ago. Today we not only have to concern ourselves with your everyday, run of the mill communicable diseases, but we also have AIDS to worry about. Safe sex is the only option you have these days if you want to live to tell about any of your sexcapades. Many of the rules governing sex today have grown out of the stronger, more dominant roles women have captured in our present society. Treat your women with respect. Show at all times what a generous lover you are. Worry about whether your woman was sexually satisfied rather than being solely concerned with gratifying yourself. Don't be afraid to introduce new things into the bedroom, so long as you do it slowly and patiently. You need to know your sexual organs and those of the opposite sex in order to fully grasp the effects sexual arousal has on both your bodies. You need to be in control of your penis. So long as you are able to incorporate all these ideals into beautiful lovemaking, you and your lovers should derive excitement and pleasure out of every sexual circumstance.

And that is the only real way to give your woman a screaming orgasm.

Sunday, December 21, 2008

Good Examples of Performing Oral Sex on a Woman

As you lead into oral sex, you may not want to go directly to the vagina but lightly kissing and licking the inner side of the thighs and/or behind the knees is a good place to start.

Typically, at the beginning of oral sex, you should begin with slow, soft licks up the shaft of the clitoris and move on to gently licking the entire vaginal area

The woman lies on her back with her legs spread apart or she lies on her stomach with her legs spread apart.

If she is laying on her stomach, she may want to lie on a pillow to raise herself up so that you can lay between her legs while licking and nibbling from behind her knees up to her inner thighs. You should lick all around the area until you come to the clitoris and then return to teasing the entire area before returning to the clitoris again.

If she is laying on her back, you may want to start by softly kissing, licking, sucking and lightly nibbling you way up her inner thighs to her clitoris.

Once you decide to pay extra special attention to the clitoris, start by pulling the hood of the clitoris back to fully expose the clitoris. Gently stroke your tongue up the shaft of the clitoris a few times.

Flick the tip of your tongue up both sides of the clitoris and trace small circles over the head of the clitoris.

Remember, the idea is to take your time and let her enjoy your oral attentions rather than trying to rush into causing an orgasm.

Try having her raise her legs up and out of the way to fully expose her vagina to your tongue. If she can put her knees up to her shoulders, this will cause the perfect position for inserting your tongue as far as possible. This also exposes the perineum and anus for oral pleasing.

While you are inserting your tongue, try moving your tongue and orally massaging the ceiling of the entrance to her vagina. You can also use the tip of your nose to stimulate her clitoris while inserting your tongue.

Many women find that it is more intense to alternate between focusing your attention on the clitoris or focusing your attention on inserting your tongue but trying to do both at the same time is not necessarily more pleasurable.

Oral sex can be the most intimate experience any couple can share. Just remember that the main focus of orally pleasing your partner is all about experimenting and having sexual fun together.

By taking your time, you can raise the sexual intensity to new heights and cause some truly mind bending, earth shaking, unforgetable orgasms!

Anal Stimulation and Anal Orgasms

This does not necessarily require the entry of a penis into the anus.

The anus and the rectum are very sensitive to damage. The outside of the Anus is also very arousing to the touch. Do not use any dry or sharply pointed objects when stimulating the Anus.

Use a water based lubrication or some saliva on your fingers. Condoms should always be used if there is any question of sexually transmitted disease. The inner walls of the anus tend to allow fluids, such as trace amounts of blood, to pass easily through the walls of the rectum and are noted for the high probability for transmission of HIV or AIDS.

The anal orgasm is a completely different feeling, just as an orgasm caused from the clitoris feels different than a vaginal orgasm.

Most anal orgasms are caused by the insertion of a penis into her rectum.

Every woman starts out thinking that there is no way that she could ever take anything into her rectum and even if she could, she thinks that it would deffenately not feel "good".

The secret to venturing into anal sex is to start out by just playing and teasing the outside of the anus and letting her let you know when she wants to take things a bit further.

Don't start out by jamming your dry finger into her anus. She won't like it at all and it can really break the mood.

Just start out slowly and softly. When she wants to try anal sex, just start out with plenty of water based lubrication and let her do all of the insertion.

You may try several times with no success but if you just let her advance at her own pace without making her feel forced into doing anything, she can begin to learn how to relax the anus to allow you in. Once the head of the penis is in, just move very slightly while not rushing or pushing to go deeper.

The natural bodily reaction is to clench down and to now allow anything to enter the rectum. You may find that she is trying to allow you in but her body naturally reacts with forcing you back out. Stimulating the clitoris can help to overcome this natural reaction. She may find that a small vibrator on her clitoris can be quite helpful in overcoming this reaction.

In a recent survey, most women who have never tried anal sex reported that they would be interested in the idea of anal sex but they also reported that they could not immagine how this could feel "good".

Of those that have tried anal sex, most reported that they did not enjoy the feelings of anal sex on the first try and most of those reported that they never tried it again.

Of those that did continue experimenting with anal sex, they reported that they did not have much success with the first few tries.

Those that did continue past the 4th try reported that they eventually learned how to relax the anal passage to achieve deep penetration and anal orgasm.

The real secret to enjoying anal sex is to relax, bear down slightly, get past the entry point and into deep penetration. When entered from behind, stimulating the clitoris can greatly assist in relaxing the anal passage.

Once she has achieved full entry, you should begin a steady rhythm. Not rushed unless she begins to buck her hips into you.

It usually doesn't take long before she will begin to feel the anal orgasm approaching. Once she has achieved an anal orgasm, she may want to draw away from you or she may want to keep going. This differs from woman to woman and whatever she is inclined to do should always be accepted by her partner.

Best Cunnilingus Positions

Laying Flat
There are a lot of sub variations on this particular position, as you can situate yourself many different ways to give cunnilingus to a woman who is laying on her back. A great beginner position is to have her laying flat on her back with her legs completely spread. Approach from between her feet and lay on your stomach between her legs with your lips at clit level. Another great one is to have her lay on the edge of the bed with her legs up in the air. Approach from the floor and as you put your head between her legs, let them drape over your shoulders. She can also try putting her feet up in the air, depending on how what is more comfortable.

With her standing facing you, kneel directly in front of her and position your lips at clit level. This is a great position to use your hands and fingers as they are freed up to explore. Try a little anal excitement with your fingers while your tongue is busy working her clit over.

Her Sitting
Chairs and couches provide can be stimulating accessories that allow for some unique positions. Try having her sit in a chair with arms, draping her legs over the arms. Approach from below, you should have plenty of room to maneuver.

Doggie Style
You just can't beat the view when you've got her on all fours with her back arched so her head slides down to the pillow. You can go straight in there or position yourself like a car mechanic and slide underneath to begin "servicing". This position also frees up your hands and fingers, so don't be afraid to let them do a little exploring.

An all time favorite, we would be remiss not to include the classic 69 position in our cunnilingus guide. The great benefit of this position is that you'll be receiving pleasure as well as giving it, so make sure you don't stop on your end. You can position yourselves in many ways (even standing), so experiment a little and find what works best for you.

Eating at the Y
Lay her flat on a table with her legs dangling off the edge. Pull up a chair directly between her legs and you're ready for lunch at the hottest diner in town. You'll have your hands and fingers free, so use them - and any handy utensils - to provide pleasure across her entire plate. Use pillows or blankets to get her comfortable as this is an easy position to operate from and can lead to longer than average cunnilingus sessions.

Face Squat
A word of warning. Any time you let a woman who's receiving oral sex position her entire body directly above your mouth, you run the risk of her practically suffocating you during orgasm. On the other hand, this position can be intensely pleasurable for her because it allows her to position herself just the way she likes it. Try stiffening her tongue and letting her ride it all the way home. You'll be surprised how many women really like this.

Best Positions for Anal Sex Intercourse

The "Spoons" Position

Spoons is a good starting position. Each partner lies on his or her side, one behind the other. This helps prevent the penetrating partner from going too fast and allows complete control over penetration. It also brings you closer to your partner so you can judge their reaction to what you are doing.

Missionary Position

The Missionary position has the receiving partner lay on their back while the penetrating partner approaches from on top. The penetrating partner lifts up the calves or shins of the receiver, exposing the anus. This can be an especially intimate position, with both partners facing each other. The Top partner can masturbate the other and is open to massage and cuddling as well.

Doggie Style

Rear entry or the "Doggie Style" is the one position most people associate with anal sex. However, rear entry allows a penis or anal toy to penetrate most deeply and may not be the best choice for the beginner. This position allows the deepest penetration and permits the receiver to better open the anus for entry. Rear entry doesn't offer the kind of intimacy or ease of communication that the other positions do, but for more advanced lovers, can offer the greatest amount of thrusting and penetration.

Full Front

The full front position has the woman lie on her back, drawing her knees up to her chest and over the shoulders of the man, who presses down on her face to face. You can place a pillow under the pelvis to raise it even higher, or the man can push the woman's feet over her head. This position allows for easy penetration and very deep entry.

Standing Position

Another favorite position is a standing one, in which both the man and the woman stand up, facing the same way, and the woman bends over at the waist, using a wall, table or other support. This can also be done on the knees, rather than the feet, at the edge of the bed. When both partners are not of the same height at the waist, some adjustment will have to be made. This position is convenient to use outdoors. It allows easy penetration and full movement if there is something solid around to hang on to.

Stomach Position

The stomach position has the woman lie flat on her stomach. Hips may be raised a little on a pillow if you like. This allows her to relax more and her hands are free. The man lies on top, he can also be more relaxed and have free hands. Penetration using this method is not as easy and you are not able to thrust as deeply. The woman is rather restricted in her movements using this position.

Side Position

From the stomach position, both partners can roll over on their sides, still facing the same way, with one leg drawn up. This position allows bodily relaxation plus free hands to explore and caress. Entry is easy and fairly deep with this position. Movement is somewhat limited, though vigorous thrusting is still easy once you get used to the posture.

Straddle Position

The Straddle Position is great because it allows the woman to control the speed and depth of penetration. Have the man lay flat on his back on the bed, the woman then straddles him and slides her ass back to meet his hard penis. Penetration is easy in this position and entry can be deep. His hands are free to caress her breasts or even slide down to massage her clit while she slides up and down on his penis.

Tuesday, December 9, 2008

Lead your guy to bed the right way, and get ready for fun

Jumping into bed with a splash of perfume behind your ears and a look of hope in your eyes doesn't always guarantee a night of passion girls.

Sexy Mena Suvari said it with flowers in the hit film American Beauty, and it hit the right spot with Kevin Spacey :)

In order for the earth to move for yourself, you need to create the right atmosphere, get your own primal urges running and to tease the hell out of your partner. Sounds like hard work?

Don't worry, as our Sarah has come up with a special 5-day plan which will guarantee a night to remember for both you and your partner...

Day One
Contact your man and invite him to dinner, either at your place, or if you can afford it, at a couple friendly restaurant that is quiet enough for you both to chat.

Use the time to resolve any non-sexual issues in your relationship but keep the mood positive. Lay on the praise, listen as well as talk and find compromises to your niggles wherever possible. But don't exhaust the issues.

Once you have made some progress, agree to leave these subjects closed until the following week.

By this time you should be ready for dessert. As this is the first day of your sex ban you won't be required to exert yourself. All that is in order is an early night with plenty of hugs so order a sugar-filled calorie concentrate, then spoon feed each other and giggle to annoy fellow diners.

Day Two
After yesterday you should be feeling positive about your relationship, if a little guilty about your diet. Now you're ripe to relieve any other tensions in your life by treating each other to a night of extended massage.

The aim is not only to relax but to locate undiscovered areas of arousal. However, direct contact with genitalia is strictly forbidden. Start at the feet and work your way up to the top of the head.

Focus energies and use a variety of stokes on each area. Try kneading, stroking and circular motions. If you are feeling frisky, go one step further and use your tongue, some fabric or a feather plucked from your pillow to send shivers down his spine.

But remember, although you both may be tempted, sex is still off the menu. Fundamentally, this is an education in your partner's anatomy.

Feedback is essential so ask what is relaxing and what is arousing or listen for involuntary gasps. By the end of the session you should have learned something new about your partner's largest sex organ - their skin! Log this data and think about how you can use it later in the week :)

Day Three
Your first task of the day is to get kitted out with kinky pants. They don't have to be pricey but they must be sexy. On the High Street H&M is the best value for sets, while Top Shop has a seductive range of briefs starting at just £2.50.

Whether or not you see your man, sex is still forbidden. This will come as a relief to some but, hopefully, will be torture to others.

There is one concession - frottage. This is the French word for stimulation through fabric which means you can do whatever you like to each other as long as your naked skin does not come into contact with his.

In other words, leave your clothes on and make like a pair of teenagers in the back row of the UCI. Be warned, it's possible for both parties to reach orgasm this way, which is quite an attribute if you are female, but probably quite embarrassing if you are a male over 13.

Day Four
By the time reach this point you should both be on the brink of sexual frustration.

However, your sex drought isn't over yet so harness that energy into discussing your erotic fantasies. But be careful not to make any revelations that will wound.

As Sigmund Freud once said: "When two people make love there are four people present - the two doing it and the two they are thinking about."

If in your case the third person is his brother or best friend, I recommend you opt for creating a new fantasy together.

Close your eyes and take it in turns to provide a piece of information as you build on the story. For example let him choose the location - like a beach or doctor's surgery, then you choose the clothes you are wearing - like nothing but flower necklaces. Or have him dressed up as a doctor. Don't worry if he's no George Cluney, that's where your imagination can run wild. And so the story goes until you bring your sweetly sordid tale to it's conclusion.

Day Five
Frankly, if you have followed the programme and don't feel as horny as a rhino on the fifth day you need to see a doctor, or another man.

Are you ready for the big day... Jump out of bed, shower, shave and moisturize then put on your new pants and present yourself to the chap waiting under the duvet.

Rub him up the right way with all the massage techniques that took his breath away on day two of this plan. Focus on his particularly sensitive areas, not forgetting the places that are no longer out of bounds, and then lie back while he does the same to you.

Next recall last nights fantasy scenarios and act out the parts you are comfortable with. But don't rush things. After four days of foreplay it would be a shame to blow it at the last hurdle.

If your fella is trying to bring forth seed with all the keenness of the staff at a garden centre, clam him down by pressing the head of the penis. Alternatively change the rhythm or demand some oral sex.

Either way, make sure the session lasts until you are both on the brink of exhaustion then give up and let the waves come washing in.

Monday, December 8, 2008

So you want a quicky in quick time? 9.5 second sex

Anyone can have 9.5 second sex. In fact, a lot of people already do - not just politicians like Paddy Panstdown, sorry Ashdown. But it is difficult. It's all very well getting creative with ice cubes and erotic cuisine when you have 9.5 weeks but what about if you've only got 9.5 seconds?

The answer is to think dirty. Men and women are brilliant at this. Some women don't even need 9.5 seconds of physical contact to reach the big O - they can pull it off simply by fantasizing about sex.

You can use modern technology to fire up his emotions. Mobile phones are now connecting people in more intimate ways than ever before. Forget telephone sex, text sex is the latest craze. If you have flexible fingers, it won't take long to use the numerical pad to tell your lover exactly what you're going to do to him during those breathless 9.5 seconds.

The main thing to remember is not to waste any of your precious time when your fella comes home, so learn the stairwell strip. Shoes removed in the hall, tops should be off by the third step, trousers or skirts should be unfastened by the last step and left to fall with undergarments on the landing. Socks should stay on, this is no time for romance!

Throw yourself onto the bed and foreplay may commence on immediate contact with "By heck pet, you look gorgeous!". When it's all over and done with, you can sit back, relax and get on with the rest of your day.